19… that’s how many unfinished blog posts that are currently on my website.  73″ish”… that’s how many “said “journal entries that have been scribbled down and never made it to my mac for the final polish and post… 3,320,331… that’s how many idea’s that have raced through my mind.  All of my thoughts are colliding… crashing into each other unable to escape the life sentence of being trapped and the unspoken idea’s, words and what if’s that will never get their chance to make their great debut and will not be given the chance to leave my mind.

So where does that leave me…. that’s easy.  One word, five letters and two hand claps (I think they call it syllables) lie in a single word that will erase my regrets… fears…. wishlist and frustration.   My what if list that will silently strangle me one day.  So the fix all magical word is…   Drum roll please!

It’s called TODAY…

Today I will actually follow my to do list.  The words of Ty patiently echo in my mind and loudly call my name.

Today…

I will stop thinking and start doing.

Today…

I will live in the moment and stop just preparing for the moment.

Today…

Today I will stop beating myself up and start listening to the words that my boys, family, best friends and favorite people remind me.  That I am great.  I am unstoppable.   I can do whatever is required to check off my larger than life things to do list I have written down to complete today.

Today…

I will talk and not yell.  Not yell at my ridiculously cute Carter even if I have asked him for the umtenth time to brush his teeth or wear socks so his stinky feet and I can be in the same room.  I won’t yell even if that requires me to walk down the 14 stairs to call my boys to dinner.  Today I won’t raise my voice at Ty because that gorgeous guy is forever my best friend.

Today my day will be balanced.

Today … if not now, when?

So that’s it.  Today I will post my blog… notice I said blog and not novel because I don’t have to ramble on forever to tell my story.  Today I will start my consistent blog posts ALMOST  every day… even if it’s only a random sunshine with a chance of rain, just spit it out kinda post. TODAY.  Love, Live and smile along the way BECAUSE life is good people ridiculously good.   Seize the day.

FULL disclosure: Please note I used the word ALMOST when referring to my almost daily posting.  Almost is huge people!  Almost is a very simple word allows me to be human.  It allows me not to expect perfection and gives me a bit of breathing room in between.  It doesn’t allow for the word fail unless I totally ScREw up and never try to post at all.  Try… another great word.  I kinda like this.  That’s all folks.  I am keeping this #$%&^ real.  lol… xoxoxo